ok, so I'm in between working on Mental Toughness and returning work emails am watching J* talk with Chase Jarvis on CreativeLIVE and Im just so inspired & so thankful for God and a God who loves me who has PERFECT timing to place the right things in front of me at the right time.
Yesterday I wanted to give up. That sounds so crazy right now because things are buzzing and exciting and amazing, but yesterday I was tired and wanted to quit. I was going to keep it quiet & stay joyful and press through && I still am/but I thought, I can't be the only one out there in the world who wants this so bad and gets so discouraged even when it seems that EVERYTHING is going right, right??!
I think this is the first time in my life that I have finally settled into something that Im really truely feel good about and love; where I am completely passionate/excited & energized and feel good about what I am doing, BUT this might be the scariest time in my life.
Things have happened so fast and sometimes I feel like I have no idea how to handle it all. I didnt think a year ago, when I decided to try this out that it would be what it is today and that my vision for the future would be so huge. Im so thankful for this opportunity/all of the love and support BUT so scared of the expectation and whether I can actually live up to all of this. I completely trust God though and know that he is fully in control of all of this. Its so easy to be scared/to compare yourself to other people/to be discouraged when other people dont understand your work/to feel completely worthless when your gear doesn't measure up, (Im still shooting crop with a D90 && I dream of a full-frame camera and professional grade lenses)--BUT GOD, as my best friend, Clarise would say, would not bring you here and not take care of it and all of it/not just teensy parts of it! This journey isnt only growing me as a artist/photographer/writer (as I attempt to communicate with you) but my faith---faith to dream big/faith as small as a mustard seed for dreams bigger than I can imagine.
I have been so lucky to make amazing friends/but sometimes you feel so protective of your dreams/goals/vision because you dont know who to trust.....
I love CreativeLIVE and Chase Jarvis & his passion for educating photographers & young photographers like me who are so hungry and want to learn!
Today, as I listen to Jasmine Star, I am so encouraged to keep going/to keep moving/to go after the dream/to be okay with being me/to make mistakes/to grow/to be confident/to love it and to CLAIM IT/to believe it/to rock it && Im excited.
I may not have enough swag for some/or be pretty enough (its raw baby, I sweat when I shoot, its hard work and sometimes rollin on the ground isnt pretty)/my colors might be too oversaturated and my compensation off/but Im a work in progress and this in my ministry/ I do this because God told me too & I want to bless people and bless my God.
So, if you haven't already signed up/if you need to be motivated/encouraged/inspired:
go to chasejarvis.com/live and watch CreativeLIVE all week feat. Jasmine Star and learn some things!!
We are back from NYC and there are some fun blogs on the way! Thank you for the support && all the love!